What does hate feel like in the body?

Key points:

• Self-control is a fruit of the Spirit, but when hate sneaks into our hearts, we can lose both self-control and awareness of who we’ve become, writes the Rev. Neelley Hicks.
• It is critical for Christians to understand the spiritual, emotional and physical warning signs of hate.
• Through self-awareness, we can recognize the triggers that set us off and take steps to de-escalate, she says.

 

Editor’s Note: This is the second of a three-part series.

In the first article of this series, I wrote about my encounter with neo-Nazis in Nashville. Confronting them brought me physically into the middle of a circle of men spouting hate.

Their energy was palpable, like faulty electrical lines sending sparks flying into the air. By God's grace, I maintained a non-anxious presence with them, enough to ask probing questions about how one of them got to the point of joining a hate group.

Our physical senses can drive us to do all kinds of things that create the outer shell that others see. Self-control is a fruit of the Spirit that can keep us from acting on humanity’s worst characteristics. But when hate sneaks into our hearts through media or relationships that affirm our worst instincts, we can lose both self-control and awareness of who we’ve become.

We are exposed to the world’s pain and horrors of existence more than ever before. A generation or two behind us might have only heard small fractions of what was happening in their day. Today, we not only know what is happening in real time, but we also witness deeper and more intimate stories of suffering. News exposure from only one or two sources may drive home just who is to blame for the world’s problems. It can become difficult to separate truth from conjecture, and we can develop simplistic views of humanity through labels and in/out groups.

When our minds start thinking of some people as less than others, we fail to become the Good News to the world. This is why it is critical for Christians to understand the spiritual, emotional and physical warning signs of hate.

The human species has survived for millions of years through automatic physical responses to danger. When we feel threatened, our bodies respond in fight, flight, freeze or fawn mode. These automatic instincts may get us to safety in danger but can affect our physical outcomes when we experience them repeatedly.

Dr. Mario F. Mendez, director of the Behavioral Neurology Program at UCLA and VAGLA Medical Center and author of “A Brain Mechanism for Hate,” told me that exposure to hate can result in post-traumatic stress disorder and a host of other problems.

“Repeated exposure to hate results in PTSD and a prolonged stress response with elevated cortisol and adrenaline and a weakened immune system,” said Mendez. “The consequences are high blood pressure, heart disease, digestive issues and greater susceptibility to illnesses."

For those exposed to hateful rhetoric day after day, these automatic responses can lead us to perceive threats all around us.

Definitions of hate vary, but the one used for this article comes from Gary Wenk, writing in Psychology Today: “an extreme form of dislike, an amplified version of anger, disgust, or contempt and a readiness to do harm.”

We can check our physical responses for warning signs.

• Does your mood quickly shift from peace/happiness to intense anger when you see the face or hear the voice of someone representing a group of people you dislike?
• Do your conversations with others often involve expressing blame or intense dislike toward a group of people you label as “bad” or the “other”?
• How comfortable are you with certain groups of people being described in terms like vermin, animals, or other dehumanizing forms?

If you answered “yes” to these questions, pause and breathe. You are more than your thoughts, and we are more than our bodies. Remember, you are a child of God. “Yes” answers may be warning signs of hate that is physically held in the body. “The hate circuit” was identified in 2008 as subjects went through MRIs while shown photos of people they hate.

“The researchers noted that this pattern of activation was different from that of other closely related emotions, such as fear, anger, aggression and danger,” writes Katharine Lang in Medical News Today. “They concluded that ‘though these sentiments may constitute part of the behavior that results from hatred, the neural pathways for hate are distinct.’”

When someone becomes angry, their appearance may change. Pupils dilate, body posture changes, and voices can sound louder and higher. Increased levels of adrenaline and cortisol course through our bodies. We may feel more alive in those moments, but those feelings wear off. People can become addicted to hate, always looking for that high they get when experiencing hate.

So what can we do if we are caught in this electrical field where our sparks are flying into the lives of those around us?

Triggers/trauma reminders

Becoming aware of our triggers (also called trauma reminders) can help us regain self-control and de-escalate intense emotions like hate.

Triggers are unique to each individual and are physically ingrained in our bodies. When we are reminded of a deeply painful experience, we may feel like we are reliving that experience. Triggers can be set off by our physical senses (sight, smell, touch, sound, taste) or by anniversaries of the painful experience.

Our moods can shift at a moment’s notice, and moods may be altered for short or long periods of time.

De-escalation

When we recognize what has set us off, we can perhaps lessen exposure to the physical reminders and find the core of who we are: eternal souls in whom Christ dwells.

De-escalating from a trigger requires a physical, emotional and spiritual reconnect. We can draw ourselves back to the present moment through our physical senses with pleasant smells, awakening tastes, listening to music, touching something comforting and looking at something lovely.

Philippians 4:8-9 speaks to calming an unquiet mind: “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable — if anything is excellent or praiseworthy — think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me — put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.” This ancient wisdom still speaks to us today.

The breath that keeps our bodies alive normally flows shallowly, but in moments of crisis, we need more oxygen to flow to our brains. Deep, intentional breathing and a comforting environment can help our bodies regulate so we can differentiate between real and perceived threats.

Community

Just as people recovering from substance addiction often seek new relationships with non-addicted people, we may also need to choose new friendships with those who are able to nurture God’s love within us so it grows and lessens hate within.

Engaging people with different opinions while calibrating inwardly to God’s grace is an exercise that can help us see people up close where it is more difficult to objectify and hate. Judgment can turn into compassion as we seek understanding.

Telling the truth in love is something we each need from friends and family. They may see changes in us while also reminding us of who we once were before hate crept in. By God’s grace, we can experience renewal of body, mind and spirit.

Hicks is a United Methodist deacon and executive director and founder of Harper Hill Global, a non-profit specializing in mental and physical health resources.

Read the first commentary, Confronting hate: What do you wear?

Listen to Hicks' interview with Dr. Mario Mendez on her podcast, Women Arise.

News media contact: Julie Dwyer at (615) 742-5470 or newsdesk@umcom.org. To read more United Methodist news, subscribe to the free UM News Digest.